A renowned author, politician, scientist and inventor, Benjamin Franklin epitomized and encapsulated the essences of today’s renaissance man, a man with intellectual acumen, creative suppleness who dressed the part and walked with a quite swagger. Mostly celebrated for his inventions and diplomacy (bifocals and the lighting rod to name a couple) his greatest discovery may have taken place within the walls of the Pennsylvania legislature, a discovery that can be leveraged to build an initial “Attraction Bridge” with that special someone.
As with any legislative body, political disagreement and opposition was commonplace during Franklin's tenure. Bothered by the lack of diplomacy and unwavering resistances for cooperation, Franklin explored for a way to help garner his opponent’s admiration and friendship when he soon came upon an old proverb:
“He that has once done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another, than he whom you yourself have obliged”
Implementing the proverb, Franklin would request to borrow books from members of the legislative. He would read the book(s) and a week or so later would return the book with a sincere letter of appreciation. In subsequent face-to-face meeting with those members he would find that there attitudes toward him had changed, they’ve become much more amiable and civil. In some cases forming life long connections.
How can you leverage this to help you “Get the girl?” Simple: Get her to do
you a favor…and follow it up with a formal "Thank you" of some kind.
If there’s a woman who you’ve had an eye out for and has been in your “peripheral”, that’s to say she knows of you but no true connection has been formed, ask her to do you a favor of some kind.
You may be wondering why this works:
When someone does you a favor they are forced to find emotional and psychological congruency. She will ask herself “why am I going out of my way to do this jerk a favor? Maybe he’s not that much of a jerk…Steve’s not that bad come to think of it”.
In this technique, by requesting her to perform a favor, you’ve put her in a situation where she needs to contemplate and justify her actions, actions that once taken will, often enough, put you in her good graces. In particular if followed by a sincere "thank you for the favor" on your end.
Another reason this works well is because there’s a perceptional power shift. She will naturally think that she has something you “need” and she holds all the cards and power. This is fine--just stay focused on the outcome.
Survival Tip: The favor must come easy to her. She shouldn’t struggle or require much effort to perform the favor. An easy favor will help her overcome her initial resistance to want to help you…
Share The Water…
Steve Amarante
www.luvjungle.com
References: Jecker, J and Landy D. (1969) Benjamin Franklin effect. Human Relations, 22:371-78
Recommended reading: YES! 50 scientifically proven ways to be persuasive by Noah J. Goldstein, Steve J. Martin and Robert B. Cialdini
Recommended site: http://www.influenceatwork.com/
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